Is this blog going to be me complaining forever? I resent this

Wed, 23 Sep 2026 02:59:40 GMT

I saw my doctor about my bipolar disorder some days ago. That was all fun and games, and I got a referral to a psychologist written up (even though I asked for a psychiatrist, but that's whatever), and
he even put me on new medication without my having to beg, but
it's epilepsy medication...

He thinks that it's a mood stabiliser because if it calms epilepsy it should calm mania as they're both too many electrical signals in the brain. This... isn't proven at all, by the looks of it. Actually, it seems to be more proven as a weight loss drug than anything to do with bipolar disorder...

He told me all about how he's nervous about putting people my age on lithium but he would readily put someone his own age on lithium without a second thought. He wants to "leave that to the professionals". Are you not a licensed practitioner lol? is this not your job?
At least the word "lithium" never came out of my mouth--that was all him. I mean, it's what I desperately wantね？ But I have a complex about drug seeking so I'll wait to see the psychologist

the new medication is really fucking me up so far. I was warned that they cause drowsiness and everything, but all I've done over the past couple of days is sleep and bawl my eyes out and lie around, and I ended up talking to my girlfriend the whole night last night. I feel like there's literally no hope in fixing my sleep schedule anymore. FML. I'm so exhausted and I have no control over anything

Today I want to try to dress nice and do shironuri but I just don't know if I have the energy.
じゃあね。、、（；；）

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Is this blog going to be me complaining forever? I resent this